Back then, fighting evil minions meant something. Nowadays, they're road blocks. Back in the day, when Capcom made a game, they had bosses you could be proud of. Of course, naming was a bit difficult... They required a crack team of experts that they named "The Mega Man Naming Committee"...

MMNC#1: "So... We have this robot here... He's made out of wood. What should we call him?"
MMNC#2: "Hmmm... I dunno... What do you think?"
MMNC#3: "He's made out of wood? Let's name him 'Wood Man'!"
MMNC#1: "That's a stupid name!"
MMNC#3: "No stupider than 'Mega Man' or 'Ice Man'."
MMNC#2: "He's got a point."
MMNC#1: "Okay. We'll call him 'Wood Man'."
MMNC#2: "While we're at the subject, how about calling that robot 'Metal Man'?"
MMNC#1: "But they're all made out of metal!"
MMNC#3: "No. Wood Man is made out of wood, not metal."
MMNC#1: "Fine! Whatever! I don't care! Let's get this done so we can leave work early!"

So, without further ado, here are the top ten Mega Man bosses:

Number 10: Crash Man
Game: Mega Man 2
Ability: To crash into you and shoot missiles

This guy likes to run right into you. You shoot at him, and he jumps up into the air and bombards you with missiles, which in turn allows him to crash into you again. The Mega Man Naming Committee decided to make a character like a Crash Test Dummy, only they added missles, made him smaller, and glued all his limbs onto his body. Defeating this guy gives you the ability to shoot missiles. That's what I don't understand. You'd think you would have a crashing ability. You know, the ability to hop in a car and slam into a wall without breaking a limb? In any case, missles are not that great. Not as great as the car thing. For that, you are left with a 10th place spot, Crash Man. A hint to defeat him: While he runs at you, shoot off his seat belt. That'll send him head first into a windshield.

Number 9: Tomahawk Man
Game: Mega Man 6
Ability: To scalp people with tomahawks

While developing new bosses, the Mega Man Naming Committee had the choice of either Cowboy Man or Tomahawk Man for Mega Man 6. Cowboy Man got scalped at the last minute, so Tomahawk Man won the position of being blasted to bits by Mega Man. He stands in one place and throws tomahawks and feathers at you. Then he jumps around and does it again. It's strange, but it's almost like fighting a Native Crash Man. Whatever the case may be, Tomahawk Man was about as efficient as Yamato Man and Knight Man, and 9th place is as good as it gets for a predictable robot. The trick to beating this guy is to get the Cavalry Blade from Colonel Man or the Rifle Gun from The Rifleman. If you can't get either, try the Hand Gun you earned from Brisco County Jr. Man.

Number 8: Plant Man
Game: Mega Man 6
Ability: Shields himself with mushroom caps

Back in Mega Man 2, there was a robot named Wood Man. He had the ability to shield himself with giant leaves. Now, Plant Man does the same thing. He jumps around in a easily recognizable pattern. So predictable, in fact, you can probably beat him without a scratch. Ever heard of the song "Plantman"? "Plantman knows where the plant still grows, plantman knows where the plant still grows..." The song would go on like that the whole time. Anyway, Plant Man = Eight Place. To win a fight against him, you must get the Stick Match Beam from Red Top Striking Matches Man and light him on fire with it.

Number 7: Charge Man
Game: Mega Man 5
Ability: Choo, choo! Crash and shoot soot.

If you thought Crash Man was cool, like the Mega Man Naming Committee did, you'll love Charge Man. He basically does the same thing, only instead of jumping, he just slams into you like a train. In fact, he acts like a train. So much like a train, in fact, that he does this attack that shoots soot from his smokestack that's attached to his back. The soot rains on you like volcano ash. Choo, choo! He looks like he came out of a deranged episode of Shining Time Station. Once, the Mega Man Naming Committe thought it would be funny if they made a robot that looked like Conductor and another like Sir Toppum Hat. Then they'd make Charge Man run around the tracks like he was Thomas The Train Engine. It got to the point where Charge Man killed all the other robots in a psychotic rage. Anyway, seventh for effort. The key to winning a fight with him is simple. When he charges at you, jump out of the way. Unlike Crash Man, Charge Man isn't a Crash Test Dummy.

Number 6: Dust Man
Game: Mega Man 4
Ability: Vacuum Cleaner

The Mega Man Naming Committee decided, one day, that the Janitor Man needed a break. So they created Vacuum Man, Mop Man, Broom Man, and Soap Man. Vacuum Man decided to just destroy everything, so he then became Dust Man. Dust Man has the ability to inhale Mega Man. In addition, he shoots these clumps of dirt that explode. Evil vacuum cleaners don't get any commoner than this guy. He can also vacuum up tiny particles, carpet stains, and a spot at number 6. The key to beating him is to go to the other side of the room and unplug him.

Number 5: Hard Man
Game: Mega Man 3
Ability: You really don't want to know...

I guess the Mega Man Naming Committee thought it would be funny to name a robot "Hard Man". So for that, insert your own dirty jokes, you perverts!

Number 4: Top Man
Game: Mega Man 3
Ability: To spin around like a ice skater

While spinning around is funny to watch, it isn't really helpful. Top Man has the power to spin. When you defeat him, you earn the ability to spin. Not much to comment on here, but if you were Bryan Boitano, you'd think this ability was great. What would Bryan Boitano do? If you fight Top Man, remember that the key to beating him is to shoot him.

Number 3: Wood Man
Game: Mega Man 2
Ability: Almost like Plant Man's, only with leaves

So this is Wood Man. He has this stupid shield that only works for him. When you earn it, it only works if you are standing still. Wood Man has the tendancy to attack loggers and lumberjacks. Also, he hates all animals that try to use him for a toilet. The creativity for this robot was genius. What will Dr. Wily think of next? Or the Mega Man Naming Committee, for that matter? He ends up at number three. Here's a tip straight from the pros: use the Agent Orange Buster you receive from Vietnam Man to incinerate Wood Man in one shot.

Number 2: Guts Man
Game: Mega Man
Ability: Throwing boulders and jumping

Guts Man was another brainchild of the Mega Man Naming Committee. Apparently, Guts Man is a miner. A miner that throws boulders and causes earthquakes. While Earthquake Man and Boulder Man were deemed weaker than Guts Man, Guts Man has a great weakness. He has indigestion, which accounts for his jumping and his number 2 place. To defeat him, you must shoot him with the Alka Setzer Blaster you get from Medicine Man. You can also make his stomach explode with one blast from the Burrito Beam you earn from defeating Taco Bell Talking Chihuahua Man.

Number 1: Metal Man
Game: Mega Man 2
Ability: He's made out of metal

To top off the list is the most ingenius robot ever made: A robot made out of METAL! Metal, unlike plastic and paper, is strong. That's what makes Metal Man special. His power is to throw metal blades at you and do all sorts of metal things. Because of this never-before-seen kind of display of genius, Metal Man tops the chart at number 1! Want to know how to beat him? Well, first you pick up the Pokemon Stadium 2 Player's Guide and look up on Steel Pokemon's weaknesses. Ground and fire top the list. So use the Dirt Shoveler you won from beating Dig Man or the Heater Ray you won from defeating Space Heater Man.