Picture this, if you will, since you'll need an image of what a flashback may be like. So imagine that the year is 1991. You're all into video games, and you're probably one of those that thinks the newer the hardware, the better the experience or some crap like that. Well, by this time, the Sega Genesis has hit the streets and the Super Nintendo Entertainment System is about ready to rumble with the Genesis. You're probably all hyped up about the next generation of video gaming, so you were too dense to realize that this game was out. Well, I was dense at that time, so I missed out on this game. Years upon years later, somebody tells me about this kick ass game that is similar to the legendary Maniac Mansion.

"Holy last wave of NES games, Nightshade!"

While most NES gamers hold a high regard to the famed Maniac Mansion, I find that this title, entitled Nightshade, much more enjoyable. So here's the deal, okay? This city is under a heavy rain of criminal activity the likes of which have only been seen, like, for the past century with other fictional stories. The local superhero, which I can't remember his name at the moment, is dead. Oh, yeah, his name is Vortex, and he kind of looks like The Flash if the Flash was drawn by John K of "Ren & Stimpy" fame. Anyhow, he is dead and stuff. D-e-d, Dead. So who is going to stop this reign of terror? Why, it's the up-and-coming new superhero: NIGHTSHADE! Nightshade has the awesome power of punching people, walking really slow, and cracking really strange Batman-esque jokes. This is an NES Horsemen kind of game, really. Really bad jokes are thrown around at random, and only somebody with the sophisticated humor that I enjoy can, uh, enjoy it. You run around the city, saving random people, solving elaborate puzzles, and ultimately beating up the bad guy, Sutekh, who kind of looks like Anubis from the Midway semi-cool 3D fighting game, War Gods. Can one man alone defeat the forces of evil? I'll answer by saying "yes" since fictional heroes have been doing it for the past couple hundred years.

"Hello, sir! I am Nightshade. If you don't mind, I'd like to go straight into the pointless kung fu fight sequence."

Much like the fabled Maniac Mansion, you take certain items or perform certain actions to get certain results that will certainly advance your uncertain progress towards this game. Certainly. However, unlike Maniac Mansion, this game takes a different approach when dealing with advarsaries. Instead of being thrown in a dungeon or getting killed by some nuclear double helix ray beam gun machine, you get into a fighting sequence much like a game of Mortal Kombat, only with faster paced action and a lack of fatalities. Enemies will range from fat old gentlemen types wearing blue suits and throwing blue hats much like Odd Job from that one James Bond movie, to giant rats that spit acid at you, to even stone jackal things that move funny and spin around in circles when you punch them, and the best enemies of all, female ninjas that will kung fu fight you for no reason whatsoever! This game is crazy, I tell you! The best part is, when you beat up somebody, your "popularity" rating goes up. This is important in developing yourself as an honest-to-goodness superhero. And while these cool action-packed fighting sequences are great, you have to remember that there is a puzzle element to this game, and you will have to eventually solve them to progress. This ain't a game in which progression means kicking Ass A to get to kicking Ass B and C in the lair of Ass D.

Ha ha ha!

As you can see in that screenshot over yonder, the dialogue is much more comical than most other dialogue that goes on in other video games. The only other game I can think of that has the same kind of great dialogue would have to be the Super Nintendo classic RPG game, Earthbound. Fun-for-all-ages humor is seldom seen in this day and age, and with good reason. With all the South Parks and whatnot running around the television sets these days, more and more things are becoming less and less comical. Take this website, for instance. I haven't done anything funny yet, and I'm not about to start today. I give you the straight story about great games that may or may not be great after all, but damn it all if I didn't give you a good tale in the process. I also haven't made fun of goths in this entire review yet, so that's something new. Anyhow, the dialogue goes on like this throughout the entire game. In addition, nobody in the entire city can remember your name, even if you max-out your "popularity" meter. People will be calling you things like "Nightcart" and "Lampshade" quite often. Ha ha, those crazy citizens! The best way to describe the humor in this game is simply "a cheap video game knock-off of the old Batman television show starring Adam West and Burt Ward". Now THAT was a show! Lots of celebrities guest starring, getting their asses kicked by Adam West every episode, and all those cool Bat Devices!

So, if you've played Maniac Mansion to death, try this sucker out. Think of it as the Earthbound for your NES. Then again, don't think of it as such. Last I checked, all those crazy Squaresoft Extremists found Earthbound to be "an insult to RPG gamers everywhere". To them I say "Final Fantasy VII is an insult to normal everyday folk like myself, and you guys are stupid goths". Ha ha, I insulted goths this time! LOLOloklo111!!

Ratings

Graphics: 3.0 / 5.0
Sound: 1.5 / 5.0
Control: 3.0 / 5.0
Fun: 5.0 / 5.0

Graphics: While everything looks neat and stuff, everything looks so pixelated. Plus, Nightshade looks really brown.
Sound: The music sucks. Yes sir, it sucks! No use trying to overanalyze it.
Control: Unlike those other point-and-click games, most of the time you will be controlling Nightshade's movements. However, when trying to pick up items and whatnot, you will resort to "cursor mode". That sucks. On the plus side, the fighting sequences rock!
Fun: You bet! Because of the added "pointless kung fu fighting" sequences, this game makes the puzzles all the more enjoyable!